i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
