Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
Randomize