all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
he laminated a picture of his dick.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize
