I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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