we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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