don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
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I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
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