Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
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