I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Randomize
