Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
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