you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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