Christians are straight up FREAKS
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
