just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
Randomize
