Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Randomize
