SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
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