hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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