ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
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