Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
What the fuck I just showed up to court still drunk and the judge told me I smelled like his wife
remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
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You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
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