I'm drive I can fine osifer
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
3 2 1 whiskey
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
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