WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
