I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
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