The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
