yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
Fun fact: My predictive text now prompts "walrus" as the most likely word to follow "intoxicated"...
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