i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
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