So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize
