Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
