Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Randomize