I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
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