Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Randomize
