singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
We just shotgunned beers for America
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
