I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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