I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
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Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
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