is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
