just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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