And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
If I die, sorry about rent.
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
Randomize
