what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
So gin and wine won't be happening again
The beer is more important than you right now.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
Randomize