When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize