I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
