After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Randomize
