I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
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