the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
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