Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Randomize
