so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
Watching her eat just hurts me
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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