im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize