You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Randomize
