you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Randomize
