that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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