'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
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