I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
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