I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Randomize
