So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Randomize
